My day started at 5:30 this morning. You see this is the time that my precious wonderful gift of a child wants to wake up. I had a hard time sleeping last night so I'm not thrilled to see him no matter how big he smiles at me...oh but he is so cute! I have this feeling like I might cry. But I suck it up and nurse him, then make the coffee and get ready to spend some time with Jesus. I'm glad that I do get this time, with Shiloh playing with his toys the house is pretty quiet and I can really focus..... I savor it because I know it won't last. I find myself rushing and then feel convicted so I try and focus on God..... but in between my prayers of "God help me not to be too prideful today" and " forgive me of my stubbornness" I can't help but think: wow the floors really need to be mopped, oh did I remember to put the clothes in the dryer? Crap I didn't run the dishwasher last night, is that poop on the floor? (shout out to you Molly) what should I wear to bible study? I hate my body! When am I going to run today? I'm hungry! Losing weight is such a pain! Girls you know the story. I feel like there are probably a million thoughts racing through my head every minute. I'm thinking about my friends and what's going on their lives, and my family too, my kids, am I doing a good job of raising them? Do I suck at it? How can I improve? All while using that scrubber thing on the toilet and answering Noah's question of what is the future. Whew! And this is about 10 min of one day! I mean it goes on and on! Let's face it ladies, it's tough being a woman! Now it's tough to be a man too, I don't want to take away from that. But I'm a woman so that is all I can really relate to. Oh and not to mention being a good wife, trying to stay sexy after three pregnancies, and really wanting to be interested in what's going on with them, encouraging them in their careers and just nurturing in general. It's a privilege to be a wife and a mother I know, and I love my man, but today I've been reflecting on just how much I have on my plate. It's quite a lot to juggle! How do I have that Mary heart of just sitting at Jesus' feet all while trying to do all of that work Martha was doing too? I mean girlfriend was just straighting up right? I can relate! But Jesus just blowed her up, so I guess I need to recognize that..... but how? Maybe my 5am times are just that... but it would help if I could forget all the little things for awhile and just focus on being a daughter of the King for once..... Thanks for listening....Love you all...
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